Wednesday, September 18, 2013

In the Meantime

I am at an "In the meantime" period of my life...

One of my former pastor's did a sermon series on "In the meantime", you know, that period of time when you've asked for something to happen over and over and over. You're not getting a "yes" or "no" answer. So your just waiting....

Historically I hate these periods of time. I am an organizer and planner at heart. I love goals!  I am not so rigid in my planning that I don't enjoy spontaneous fun but I like to have an idea of what I am doing. 

During my recent reading of "What Happens When Women Say Yes To God" by Lesa TerKeurst, I discovered started with a question to God and got a definitive answer. Now in truth, it was not the answer I was looking for.  It was a :"continue what you are doing where you are right now" answer.  I was hoping for a new job to fit into my children's school schedule and bring us back to a dual income family.  I got, "continue what you are doing right where I have put you. Serve my people.  

Ok, God...I say trying not to be disappointed by having to once again sort through which bills to pay and not pay this month. 

What I have learned through my former Pastor's sermon series was that in these times you need to seeking God. How...thru prayer and study of His word. The truth is that these years that God is allowing me to stay home and take care of my family, I have time. Time that I never had while I was working full time outside of the home. Time to sit in the presence of his Holy Spirit. Now don't get me wrong, I can't spend my whole day on my favorite chair in meditation. But I have to a choice as to what I do and when I do it. So I don't have to get up at 5:30 in the morning to get in my time with God. 5:30 doesn't seem to work well for me anyway because there are other things that I seem to need to do to get the day started.

These days I can get my kids on the bus at 7:15, get my husband out the door and then sit down at my desk or my black chair in what is becoming my "office". And spend time listening to praise music and reading.  I have often journaled and these days, because I can get so easily distracted, I am also trying to write down prayers in a prayer journal to keep my focus.  

As a young single woman, I met a man that I developed a wonderful friendship with over the years I began to grow in love with him. It seemed though that he was struggling with the idea of commitment. It was during that time that I wrote out 1 Cor 1:4-8 as a plea that my love for him would grow in line with that scripture. I substituted our names. Whether or not our relationship became a marriage, I wanted his friendship and I wanted it to be in line with what God wanted.  

I came across the two page prayer the other day and have since mislaid it but it was a reminder to me that I read that prayer every day for months from that sheet. And you know what......

That man and I have been married now for going on 10 years and have two beautiful sons.  I can't deny God's timing.  He gave me more than I could have ever imagined back then and so many of the dreams that I have had over my lifetime have come true...

In the meantime...I pray, study and wait, in expectation...

"Being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Jesus Christ." Philippians 1:6

Friday, September 13, 2013

#I Said Yes

Yes, yes I did!  #I Said Yes to God's calling!

"May all who seek you rejoice in you and be glad in you; may those who love your salvation always say, 'Let God be exalted!'" Psalms 70:4

Twenty years ago I said yes to the knocking on my heart and invited Jesus into my heart. I was excited by the wonderful possibilities that a life with God could bring.  I was expecting that things in my life would turn into gold and become so much easier.  Well..not exactly.

When my life struggles continued to be my life struggles, I worked hard to help the church; I had been so excited I thought if I just did enough outreach and "church stuff", things would change...

The truth is, that my life situations did not change until I started a completely committed relationship with God. That didn't happen until 6 years later.  On a spiritual renewal weekend, I sat in the presence of Jesus for 3 days and it changed my life.  After that experience, I realized that I could no long do the things that I wanted to do for God. I had to do the things that he told me to do, whether or not I wanted to do it made no difference.  It was then that I began serious bible study, took ministry seriously and eventually over the course of the last 14 years began learning to make decisions based on God's word.

During the last 6 weeks, I have been involved in a Proverbs 31 ministry Online Bible Study which has reminded me of things that I have some heart knowledge of, but haven't been practicing in my life daily. Over the last couple of years I haven't been wondering where God has been.

The book is called "What Happens When Women Say Yes to God" authored by Lysa TerKeurst. I highly recommend this book to anyone wanting to God working through them. When my Yes moment came during these six weeks it was amazing.  It was out of the blue and honestly I said"Yes!" without any hesitation because I knew it was what God wanted me to do!

After being a nurse for about 9 years, I wanted to be at home with my boys.  God made a way for me to do that.but has not been easy for our family.  But I know that this is what God is calling me to do for now. A few years ago I began helping our neighbor, who is a widow, by watching her twins after school and during the summer. There are days that I would want to pull my hair out because the children didn't always get along. There are days that I felt like I was doing some good with these kids.

One August afternoon, I received a call from a woman at a local business looking for a babysitter for one of her employees. Through the course of the conversation I could feel God telling me that this was what he was asking me to do.  Would I be willing to take on another child in the afternoon?

There was no hesitation...I said yes!

Now, I have a house full of children including my own two...sometimes it was a bit tense and it is never quiet. But God is giving me the wisdom and strength to get through it and I have no doubt that he will continue to do so. Even on those days I want to pull out my hair.

"It is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose." Philipipians 2:13

Thursday, September 5, 2013

Lower Your Nets

So today I am thinking about the story from the New Testament story in John 5:1-11 where Jesus provides a miraculous catch of fish.  Jesus told Peter to lower his nets in the sea even though they had  already been out the night before and returned empty handed.
I had not been thinking much about the possible importance of this story in my life until this week.  The story appeared to me three times in recent days. It was the subject of my husbands sermon a few days  ago, it was in a devotional this week and it was featured in this weeks chapter for the "What Happens when Women say Yes to God!" Study I am in.
So I thought as I realized it was a three peat, what is it that God is trying to tell me?
One of the things that I have been struggling with for a while is disappointment in my ministry.  Sometimes it seems as if I have been out all night on the fishing boat and I am coming up empty handed. Granted, sometimes that means that I was doing things all wrong...but in this instance I don't believe so. I think that God is reminding me that no matter what happens I need to continue to lower my net because I will never know when the catch will be one that exceeds my expectation. Continue my work in my church even when return from a long time of fishing without catching anything. I need to continue to lower my net. What about you, where do you think God is calling you to continue to lower your net even thou you don't seem to be catching anything at the moment?